Hey

Well I haven't blogged in awhile sorry about that. Last Thursday I went to go talk to a counsler. She kinda helped but it just kinda made me more sad I cried for most of the day. I go again tonight to talk to her and I truthfully can't wait she seems like the only person i can tell everything to and she doesnt judge me. I've been talking to Kolten alot lately and he really wants me to move up to Minot with him. I have been seriously thinking about doing it. Kolten is an old friend of mine that I've known forever I tried to date him in high school and he didnt want a relationship, and now he is and im starting to think that it would be a good place for me to go. If I move I can actually go to school to do what I want to do. That would be great cause I really do not want to go to school to be a business major or an accountant. Its just so hard cause sometime I think I still love Billy but the more I think about it the more I think that I love him because of Adison. Like I say that I love him but I just dont think that I am in love with him. I wish things were easier, and I love adison but I wish I would have waited. Because i wouldnt be in this situation right now I would be going to school to do what I want to do and I don't think I would be living with Billy like I am now. I don't really know what would have happened but I do know that things would have been SO much easier. This past weekend was fun tho. I had a bunch of my friends over and we drank and had a good time. Billy actually smiled this weekend. That was a huge shocker to me. Kolten is in California this week for training which kinda sucks cause I can't really talk to him but he can text which is nice and he said he would call me whenever he had the chance. I sure hope he does cause the would be awesome I havent really gone a day without talking to him since we started talking so it is going to be hard. But he did text me and let me know that he made it there and that he was heading into the meeting. Friday night was interesting, I got online and he was talking to me and all of a sudden his ex girlfriend told him she was pregnant when she really isnt. I felt so bad for him cause he had went out with his brother to the bar and he had a great time and then he comes home to hear that bullshit from his gf! She's kind of a bitch anyways, but still I sure hope she's not cause I dont really want to deal with her cause I'm sure she would start shit that is stupid. But anyways, Adi is crawling all over the place and she is standing up against the couch playing with toys so im sure she will be walking soon :S thats gonna be scary she is already into EVERYTHING lol. But I guess I should pry go ill blog tonight when I get home from the counsler.